tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6261670119972823151.post1869792525862069857..comments2023-09-06T00:54:22.419-07:00Comments on David N. Alderman: Flash Fiction Friday #0 - ValentineAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01900216633662961062noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6261670119972823151.post-73792114587677253762014-08-12T21:54:38.564-07:002014-08-12T21:54:38.564-07:00It's good to hear from you again, J.H. I am al...It's good to hear from you again, J.H. I am always honored when you drop in and leave me a note. Yeah, I'll admit that Flash Fiction Fridays trip me up from time to time simply because personal matters arise, but I'm becoming pretty consistent in delivering each week. <br /><br />Thanks for your thoughts on this piece. I'll take them into consideration if I polish the piece at some point. <br /><br />I'm going to be blogging more real soon here. I kind of fell out of blogging my thoughts on Christian fiction and related topics and have been focusing more on my own writing projects lately, but I want to get back into the swing of posting on different topics.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01900216633662961062noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6261670119972823151.post-6156130184870796932014-08-12T14:06:00.198-07:002014-08-12T14:06:00.198-07:00__Hi David, it’s that “lurking” hidden follower. S...__Hi David, it’s that “lurking” hidden follower. Shame on me for finally getting the nerve to comment, only to let 2 years go by! Glad to report I’m alive and well, but, man, do I feel lousy. Please forgive me; my intention is to support Christian writers!<br /><br />__Glad you joined the Friday Fiction scene. It’s a test of discipline, for sure. Not many bloggers last, but it doesn't surprise me that you have. Watching you scribe in the strength of the Lord has been encouraging to say the least! Keep going!<br /><br />__More to the point of this comment: nice piece. I was able to "see" Valentine with vivid phrases like ‘Little Red Riding Hood’; ‘killing—and lots of it’; and ‘Valentine said nothing’. She’s the strong but silent type. And although the impression felt a bit stereotypical, she does a very un-stereotypical thing by not slaughtering the bandits. Now she’s interesting.<br /><br />__I’m confused. In paragraph 6 you called the four surrounding Valentine “bandits”, which felt more like a suggestion rather than a description. Why does baseball-bat-man call the city 'theirs'? Seems like if they’re bandits they’d always be on the go, not settling down someplace, especially a place that “used to be a city.” “ “We have nothing to steal,” the sensible man said”, but if it really is their city why be concerned about what Valentine has rather than why she’s on their turf? They had a pistol. If all they cared about was her belongings, why not shoot first? Their actions confused me a little.J.H.noreply@blogger.com